Hanging On

I’ve gotten so used to having Angie Blackwell and Buddy West around that in driving up to the Community Center today, a little anxiety crept up on me. Of course I was all too familiar with the election results from the previous evening, since the Tribal Chair is whom our Election Board calls first with the results. Even though I had won, I was also very much alone. And I approached the General Council Meeting today with the same reluctance that as a kid I approached one of my aunts’ dogs who had snapped at me once, so closely in fact that to this day I can recall his hot breath and the sound of snapping teeth.
All afternoon today I waited for that bite.
Buddy had chosen not to come in today, understandable considering the circumstances. I missed him immensely. And Angie left at the onset of Other Business, equally understandable because there were at least one or two people who were likely to be taking parting shots. I missed her as well. Despite the differences I might have had with those two, because honestly we rarely agree all the time with anybody in our lives, having them present conferred a sense of security. Kind of like having two buddies while walking down a dark alley at night. If the bad guys decide to strike, at least you’ve got back-up.
But the bite never came. I felt the breath, but never the fangs. And on a weekend that could ultimately end up being two steps back for the Tribe, for now things feel okay.
Elections and politics in general, have a way of bringing out the dark side in people. In having the good fortune to speak with a well-known regional politician last month, I was told that some leaders motivate (in this conversation he meant campaign) by fear, loathing, and playing upon people’s weaknesses, while others motivate by hope, inspiration, the promise of better days and greener pastures ahead. I’ve come to the conclusion that one is infinitely better than the other, but both are effective. That is what I still have a hard time getting used to.
Wednesday night’s Council meeting was atrocious. I’ve never felt like such a target. Somebody showed up only to try and get a rise out of me and make me look bad. It all felt so coordinated too, and set up. Watching opposing Council members joke and chuckle at me while leaving, clearly enjoying the hatchet job, once again had me questioning my desire to do this another three years. Not only did they want to get rid of me, and really us, but they wanted to give a kick in the rear on the way out. Winning the election isn’t enough. Humiliating defeat, taunting, and smugness have to be thrown in there too.
I don’t know if Saturday’s results mean a lapse or end to the meanness that has become Grand Ronde politics. In losing two people who for the most part stood for what I did, it’s hard to call it a victory. But staving off the sweep for a second straight year has to mean something. As one out-of-towner told me today, the votes I got reflect that Tribal members away from Grand Ronde do care, that the seemingly huge gang of locals and large families who follow the WIF (Wisdom, Integrity, Family) party aren’t going to monopolize every election.
What will be really interesting now is what happens next. Does the movement that has won two straight elections have a purpose or is it strictly about control? More importantly, do they intend to undo what we’ve built? Based upon the reaction that Monty Parazoo’s question about enrollment seemed to draw from at least three opposing Council members, I can’t help but wonder if there will be more passive-aggressive sabotage efforts mounted to derail the amendment. I almost wonder if the two Special Enrollment issues of “Tilixam Wawa” are going to happen now.
Following the meeting, my opponents converged to talk, lowering their voices to hushes as I walked by, clearly not wanting me to hear them. But I heard them still, and not even trying to eavesdrop. They had a large space rented in Sheridan, from what I heard.
“What are we doing?”
“We’re celebrating. And we’re gonna start talking about next year!”